Saturday 30 April 2011

Chris's Guide to Fat Reduction

How to get the most out of this guide;
In bold font as above is the key point. In italics below as in this case, is the main description. The 'more detail' section is further reading. You may wish to browse through and read the more detail section as you progress in your fat reduction programme, or want the knowledge to confirm a key point. The yellow highlighted sections are points to note.


Firstly: Realise how obese you are


Today's society is health conscious with many comparable measurments of fitness. One of these is the body mass index (BMI) test you are no doubt familiar with. This however is only a very rough guide that can be de-motivational for it's inablity to take into account varying factors. Fat percentage measurement therefore is an essential accompaniment to BMI when over-viewing your weight loss programme. (More detail: those aware of standard deviation will understand that outlining numbers affect variance and consequently the SD which whether higher or lower will determine reliability/accuracy of results. In comparison; failing to account for a factor such as an individuals greater bone density that the BMI scale does not, will lead to an unrealistic determined ideal weight. Hence this exemplifies one of several factors as to why I say BMI is a rough guide. The BMI is more 'helpful' because the average person does not have the ability, resources, knowledge or commitment to account for these factors).



Secondly: Summarise why you want to be less fat


What is it you will gain from being less fat? i.e. become more attractive, more desirable to a potential date, to fit into clothes better, for health reasons? and so on. (More detail: Understanding personal intrinsic and extrinsic motivational factors will help realise goals and can be used to reinforce commitment to the exercise/weight-loss programme further down the line. 'The level of effort that an individual is willing to put forth or level of motivation behind it, is a function of the value that the individual attaches to the possible rewards and of the individual's perceptions of the probability that effort will result in reward'. (Chelladurai, 1999). The health belief model for instance is a good example to apply when weighing up wanting to be less fat for health reasons.)


Thirdly: Choose your focus; exercise or nutrition?


Combining exercise with a balanced diet is important. Hopefully you will balance both 50/50 but be realistically it is never straightforward. Are you going to focus on burning more energy to achieve fat loss? Or will you reduce the amount of energy you take in?  For example, I will be concentrating my efforts on exercise 60% and nutrition 40%. This is tailored to my individual needs and can be adjusted on my voyage of self-realisation as commitment, needs and situation demands. (More detail: there is a vast amount of proven research that will confuse even the most up-to-date researcher via conflicting advice and theories. In my experience, some key points that are undisputed are;

-Nutrition; input v.s. output. If input of energy in is greater than output of energy, then fat will accumulate. Adversely, if output of energy is greater than input, then fat will reduce. An exact balance of these will never occur. This is the most important element of fat loss that I can put simply. To state the obvious; 'it is important to emphasise eat less calories than what you burn'. I use the term calories, as with BMI described earlier, as it is more accepted/understood by the majority compared to kilojoules of energy.

  • Nutrition; It is impossible to convert fat to muscle. Fat is stored energy. There are three different energy systems.
  • Nutrition; muscle weighs more than fat. So when you weigh yourself, you may have gained weight but actually reduced fat hence the importance of fat measurement. Muscles will define your physique, support movement, protect the body, enable movement etc. So don't be down-heartened or attempt to lose weight solely through dieting. It might make you feel good when on the scales but is unhealthy and leads to weight rebound.
  • Nutrition; although none of us want to hear this... 'there is a 2-3lb maximum weight loss possible each week'. Beware of being clinical about this as you could end up with what's termed as orthorexia nervosa. My opinion and not my advise is, that if you want to lose more the maximum, then go for it. There are a lot of motivational benefits in my experience of losing weight fast that strengthen commitment, improve motivation and so on, through external feeback and postitive thoughts that your actually getting somewhere. Once you get to that all time low weight, you can than build muscle back up, adjust eating regime etc but it is indescribably harder than losing weight the responsible way. Eating disorders, nutrition deficiency, the depression of weight rebound, strict regime, the impact on your life and so on is most undesirable and perhaps desperate. I've done it, so can understand this perspective. Yes you will lose fat but also muscle and to a certain point of starvation, you body starts to digest itself.
  • Nutrition; the initial weight loss can be dramatic then you hit a plateau. This is because it's mostly water you are losing.


-Exercise; training at a specific heart rate is generally not important excluding for instance stroke recovery victims, specific athletes and so on. The theory behind this is that one energy system will use a source of fuel such as glycogen at a higher heart rate compared to fat being used at a lower heart rate. In reality, I emphasise exercise and don't worry about heart rate. It all comes down to burning stored energy. 

  • Exercise; Duration of exercise is a complicated factor, but put simply; the longer you exercise the more calories you will burn.
  • Exercise; muscular strength training combined with cardiovascular training is of high importance than training just one area.
  • Exercise; after muscular exercise microscopic tears exist in the muscle fibre. These tears heal over a day or two and make the muscle bigger/stronger than previously. It is therefore important to rest 24-48 hours between heavy muscular workouts, such as using weight lifting apparatus.
  • Exercise; there are three types of muscle fibre. Building these specific fibres can be achieved via set repetitions with a suitable weight.
  • More point's shall follow upon editing.


Fourthly: Create goals

Identify your fat loss target, create incremental goals leading up to your ultimate goal. For instance; The American college of Sports Medicine recommends men aim for a healthy body fat level between 8 and 22 percent. 3% is the minimum males can live on. Realistically I should aim for 10-12%. This is my ultimate goal. I will work out a time-frame to lose fat healthily in stages by achieving dealines. 


From a personal perspective; I work out that I weigh 18 stone seven (262lbs) or 118kg. I can lose a maximum of 3lb or 1.4kg per week. A healthy weight for my size of 6ft 2" is roughtly 15.7 stone or 220lbs or 100kg. Therefore I can aim to lose roughly 1.4kg or 3lbs per week over 13 weeks. For the purposes of this study my body fat percentage is currently 40%. Therefore my ultimate goal is to lose 28% body fat which equates to a 2.2% body fat loss per week for 13 weeks. Waist size 43" at band. 46" at naval. Chest roughly 48". Basal Metabolic Rate (BMR) 2,223 calories per day which will subsequently decrease as my weight reduces. 


Fifthly: Be prepared


Equipment; ensure you acquire everything you need for the gym, outdoor workout, sports participation, exercise classes and so on. Such items can include loose fitting clothing, specialist running shoes, well maintained bicycle, water bottle, ipod, rucksack and so forth. Keep it clean and ready to use unexpectedly. Investing the effort ensuring supply will prevent motivation to exercise being hindered


Food; ensure you plan ahead. Make a list of food items that can be stored long term and schedule when to purchase your fresh items before they run out. Be proactive not reactive. Prepare food in advance and know what you are going to eat on that day. Aim to consume five fist sized meals spaced out over the day. It helps to make everything yourself as you know exactly what it contains, plus an added bonus it the merger of a 'detox' eating plan i.e. no caffeine or E colourings, foods containing more than the recommended daily allowance of a nutrient, non-organic produce and so on but this is your personal choice. In-depth nutrition will be covered during a future edit. 


Resources; investigate your local exercise options. Leisure centre timetable, walking route maps, exercise class lists, events such as marathons, sport teams recruiting players, gym fees, personal trainers in the area, friends recommendations or even exercising with friends. The options are endless but being prepared and knowing how to take advantage of anything that offers you a suitable way to exercise is important.


Your body; look after it. Warm up and cool down. Increase the intensity of exercise over a period of time. Don't rush in and cause injury to yourself thus affecting your ability to do any exercise at all. Something is better than nothing and fitness takes a lot longer to build up than to lose. Sleep well via 8-9 hours uninterrupted sleep a night and more if you need. Muscle fibres are torn during exercise and repair when you rest. Eat well and look after your mental health. Over-training or exercising when your ill is detrimental, doing more harm than good.    


Sixthly: Monitor your Progress

Keeping accurate records of your achievements (positive or negative) will help you to reflect. It will also motivate, keep you focused and help maintain an the equilibrium you desire.


Seventhly: Get the Knowledge


Knowing what's contained within a certain food will help you to source low-calorie products. Knowing why you should exercise for at least thirty minutes a day will encourage positive health. A better understanding the physiology helps target specific muscles in a quest for a desired look. Understanding sport psychology might show you that team exercise is easier to commit to than individual exercise. The reasons are endless and I would strongly advise reading more than this blog.


Furthermore: 

I am tracking my progress via two applications; 'Runkeeper' and 'Myfitnesspal'. These applications available for iphone, record nutrition and exercise information. It then updates it to the internet and facebook. So far they seem good tools to use as a guide. The reliability of results seems fairly good but should be taken light-heartedly as a rough guide. I will be updating the results via this blog from Monday 2nd May 2011 onward for 13 weeks.


MyFitnessPal - Free Calorie Counter

Body Measurement Record


Week 1: Monday 2nd May-8th May Starting Measurements

Waist size 43" at band. 46" at naval. Chest roughly 48". Neck 18".
















End of Week One Feedback:

The initial motivation to lose weight decreased throughout the week. The feeling of hunger overcame my will power. Changing eating habits to alternative foods proved difficult. Reasons include the cost of healthy food is noticeably more than that of less healthy choices for instance buy one get one free offers, Iceland £1 offers, value meals etc. I also have this big love/craving of pizza and Philadelphia cream cheese. Convenience is a massive factor. Preparing healthy food is very time-consuming. My lifestyle this week included eating in restaurants, family take-away meals, cinema slush puppys/snacks and beer for watching football/socialising. Keeping record of everything is very difficult, reduces freedom and when you don't complete something accurately it puts you off the programme, for you feel the accuracy is lost. From record of food at http://www.myfitnesspal.com/food/diary/ChristopherHilliard it seems I tend to eat a much greater amount in the evening for dinner out of hunger and not enough for breakfast/lunch. This may also be because I'm sitting about doing nothing. Mood wise, when on my own I'm depressed, lethargic, tired, moody, fed up, out of breath from light movement, lazy and generally down. Thoughts relate very much to initial goals/reasons for wanting to lose weight with slightly less focus on academic purposes. Exams etc reduce my ability to keep track. Life events such as social exclusion at Uni, Football club losing the premiership etc (external) have impacted me internally to think along the lines of giving up. I need to stop this.

Next Steps


Reflect on blog. Reinforce my short-term goals to achieve long-term. Break these down even further to a more manageable realistic expectation. It is apparent that nutrition intake I find hard to control, therefore my focus on exercise to substitute the excess must increase. This week I shall work on that. A friend kindly noticed my running pattern and advised breaking it down. I will continue to try this technique. More on nutrition; prepare meals in advance for the week. Eat a lot more during the day for breakfast and lunch but reduce amount in evening. Metabolism is increased during day. Completely cut out the alcohol. I have a feeling this is partly affecting my current mood. Focus on oneself and not others to reduce impact of external factors on mood to motivation. I'm not hungry after exercise so much, so exercise more.

Week 2: Monday 9th May - 15th May Starting Measurements


Exactly same as Week 1. No change.

Feedback as above.

Week 3: Monday 16th May - 22nd May Starting Measurements









Waist size 43.5" at band. 47" at naval. Chest roughly 48". Neck 18". (CHANGE OF + .5 " at waist and + 1" at Naval)















































End of Week 3 Feedback


The results show a 1.6lb weight loss. A 0.6% fat Loss. However the results do show a -0.4% drop in body water although bioimpendance is know for unreliability. I have my doubts that I have lost weight or fat. Even if this is the case, I've eaten so much 'junk' food toward the end of the week that it will no doubt affect readings next week. I have suspended my record of calorie intake for the same reasons discussed in week 1 feedback. I sustained severe pain in the lower legs from running known as shin splints. I need to take up low-impact exercise such as swimming and cycling. Cycling will be my focus, and I am in the process of choosing bicycles, arranging payment etc. For now I will work on the ski machine, static bicycle and muscular training. Perhaps the odd run enduring the pain (ill advised) because I do really like to run now. Right now on my desk there is evidence of last nights binging on trifle, Galaxy chocolate, lasagne, pot noodle, 2 big bags of Doritos crisps, a 200g tub of full-fat Philadelphia cream cheese and four cans of sugary sprite/fanta. Unless I exercise for hours per day, which is impractical, I need to find healthier alternatives to these eating binges. Although right now, I'm feeling tired, have an overdue essay to do, have the option of gym, returning a game to Blockbuster video rental and going shopping BUT all I want to do is watch TV, play my new Xbox and get more junk food from the local shop rather than walk ages to for the healthier options at the supermarket. I am divulging all this information for future analysis into the little things that lead to bigger problems.

Next Steps


tbc


Week 4: Monday 23rd May - 29th May Starting Measurements


18 STONE 9LB. Fuck it. This is taking too long. Sod worrying about losing muscle. I'll do it the way I know best... starve myself, puke up every now n then and exercise like a mad man. That was my initial thought when in reality the weight gain is attributed to lack of exercise due to injury, overdoing the alcohol and food when a friend came to stay and lots of sitting around doing nothing but reading for revision during the exam period at University. I'll think of plan of action once these exams are out of the way in a couple of days, untill then, this is on the backburner.


Week 5: Monday 30th May - 5th June Starting Measurements

I have left the diary entries in this ongoing guide to show the mindset of the individual undertaking a fat reduction programme. Whilst unprofessional, it is a true reflection that can be evaluated. For instance; the tone of language indicates disappointment, demotivation and anger. Mood changes associated with stress are present. Exams, injury and commitments all affected the lifestyle that is needed to fully commit to an exercise programme. Displacement theory would also suggest the individual blaming factors other than them self for deviation from the desired outcome. In the end I did not starve myself, in fact I've eaten what I wanted and not exercised. This has helped me to de stress, concentrate on my examinations, recuperate from injury and stop being overly focused on the task at hand (too expectant). I've been consciously moderating my alcohol intake, eating more fish/veg and drinking more water. I have purchased a hybrid bicycle for off road & on road low impact exercise. I have a bit of a passion for cycling, feel I am very motivated and have realised subconsciously imagery will help me flow into the new energy outlet. This week I will be revising for a psychology examination which I will apply to my current circumstance. I will make the effort to set aside time for gym, study and on Saturday my bicycle will be ready to really put the effort in hardcore.









































Week 6: Monday 6th June - 12th June Starting Measurements (no D)


Week five involved very little to no exercise. There was a day I didn't eat at all but drank a lot of alcohol. Overall my alcohol intake has come down and it was one binge drinking session on a Wednesday night out. During the week I was drinking a lots of sugary/caffeine drinks and my appetite seemed to be reduced. Normally I would drink caffeine free, sugar free drinks. I was surprised at the results but I was feeling a bit de-hydrated so it could be down to that and I am starting to seriously doubt the reliability of the measuring scales. I have concluded that for now, it will best to take the mean recording of three measurements for greater accuracy. Week six I will be returning home from University to my new purchase of a hybrid bicycle, where I intend to take on a strict exercise and diet regime. I plan on long distance cycling and reduced calorie intake concentrating on fish and other high protein nutrition.





















































Following on from doubts on the reliability of bioelectrical impendence analysis, it is apparent that repeatability is compromised. The better alternative would be hydrostatic analysis, however barriers to using this method exist. It is therefore necessary to continue with the body fat measurement undertaken with consideration of water in the body, skin temperature and recent physical activity. I acknowledge the following website;
http://www.sport-fitness-advisor.com/calculatebodyfat.html which provides seemingly accurate information from Phil Davies who holds a first class honours degree in Sport Science. Callipers may be the alternative method although positioning should be done by an experienced trained individual. Staff at a local gym may be able to help but I don't feel too confident about doing that, so my usual way will suffice for now. Davies site is similar to my blog and admittedly more detailed although this is a good base for me to build on. The thing that makes 'Chris's Guide to Fat Reduction' blog contribute to knowledge furthering understanding is using myself as a Guinea Pig. This helps understand processes of the individual who is unique, when going through proactive lifestyle change regime.

Personal note: I am finding my patience to reach my goals in wavering. I am currently seeing this as a good thing but do realise that it goes in the face of my method for losing fat gradually. The plan was uptake of a healthy lifestyle and avoidance of muscle loss as well as weight rebound. That's the good thing about experiments though, you discover things and perhaps this coming change is what is suited to the individual in a tailored exercise programme way. Theoretical implications exist from Allport's trait theory perspective, in that me being a Type A individual exhibiting behaviour such as aggression, competitiveness and ambition may have a prerequisite to fast fat/weight loss with the inability/greater difficulty of sustaining a slow loss. It would be good to design a research method whereby Cattell's 16pf test helps identify another individual exhibiting type A behaviour such as patient, relaxed and easy-going and compare the how adaptions in the time period of fat/weight loss exercise impact on their motivations and so on.

On a final note, I would like to ask a rhetorical question regarding other researchers notes on fat loss; have you been as fat as me, previously lost a substantial amount of weight, gone through a weight rebound and can offer this inside knowledge from a personal perspective? Doubtful. Therefore are you as qualified or able to use such an eclectic approach? My intention is not to promote myself but make other researchers aware of their position and to take this in account when evaluation fat loss and advising others.

Week 6: Monday 13th June - Sunday 19th June;

Somehow I feel like I've lost a week somewhere? I could of sworn I missed a week but obviously not! This week I really have been trying hard to reduce body fat. I aimed to do so based on situation changes of moving home to a new place, start of a new temporary job and now being in possession of a bicycle . I've eaten below the recommended daily allowance of calories, had only 1 beer the whole week and the only 'naughty' food was a small amount of fried potato squares at work. I justified it as on all these other diets they let themselves have a treat now and then, I'm not going to think too much into it. Houmous if fatty wich I subdued to with a prawn salad thing but mostly I've skipped meals, especially breakfast and have had small dinners. Like really small for me. One microwavable ready meal which are tiny anyway and perhaps a couple of rolls. One day I just had a sandwhich for dinner after work. The thing I've noticed is work keeps me busy and is a distraction from eating. This I would say is the major factor in not having the time to eat. Breaks are restricted and the canteen provides great healthy alternatives, with a wide and rather delicious selection for healthy food. No mayo, sauces etc are needed. I had some holoumi cheese but a I feel I've balanced this diet quite well. Obviously avoiding meals is unadvised but I'm feeling quite happy in myself, my body at least, at the changes. I also weighed myself on another machine which measured body fat. It read that my body fat was actually under 30% anyway. The accuracy of either those scales or mine are flawed! This is a major mess up and kind of undermines the whole experiment however the blogs are a source of information. What I'm going to have to do, is when I have the time, go and measure myself on several body fat readers, taking the average result. This will cost a bit if done regularly so I will limit my blog to fortnightly updates instead. I think this is more suited anyway, because body changes are more holistically accurate at say 10-14 days compared to seven in my opinion. I can feel my waist getting slightly smaller and it's a good feeling to know coupled all the walking around I'm doing at work is burning so much more energy compared to the time I'd spend eating procrastinating at Uni, being dormant in my room. I have been dehydrated this week, quite majorly as it's so hot in the department store, you sweat all day but can't be seen drinking in front of customers. There must be some law on this! Ahh well. This is going well, the diet that is, the job is depressing in the extreme. Several occasions I nearly drunk alcohol or ate what I shouldn't, but I'm actually amazed at my self-discipline that has become apparent. I don't want to ruin the hard work I've put in, I remember this and avoid thinking of the tasty easy option. I rush past the pizza section, just a quick glance, because if I think about it mmmm pizza, OK stop it! Lol and move on. I'm not going to photo my weight this week, I will wait and suprise myself either next week or the week after. What a motivator that will be to see the pounds shed. I must cycle more though.

Week 7: Monday 20th June - Sunday 26th


I can see my ribs! Lol. I've lost about a stone I think. There's some scales in the household I'm staying and according to these I'm 17 and a half stone. Visibly, I'm fitting in clothes slightly more comfortably, muscularly I'm feeling slightly less powerful. I've only cycled once due to work commitments unfortunately, it's just not practical for the short distance I have to travel, or fitting in after work. However, I walk about so much at work and sweat in the hot summer environment that I'm sure I'm burning a fair amount of energy continually throughout the day. I eat one meal a day, in the afternoon and sometimes dinner. Today I pigged out, had pizza and tonight several tuna wraps and prawns. This I will have to burn off tomorrow on my day off with a long cycle ride if I wish to keep this momentum going. It's a good feeling to be stepping in the right direction, considering I've been trying for a while now. Lifestyle changes have definitely helped. The only drinking I've done is one heavy session on a date, but other than that, I've been doing really well. I read at the hospital that alcohol is the equivalent of pure fat, so if I drink a pint, that's about 250 calories. I could of got through ten pints in a heavy night, which was 2 or 3 times a week and not even the most athletic person is going to burn that off. Mentally, I'm feeling positive at the moment, even if socially I am neglecting maintaining friendships but I am being far more responsible, controlled, less wild and more structured. The lack of TV has certainly helped me, not eating in my room and concentrating on one particular academic business book that would help anyone to sleep! Living in a home that requires a lot of respect, as you can imagine sharing a household with an elderly person has had it's impact through limitations on my lifestyle in a good way. On another note, the grammer, structure, accuracy and so on of this blog is poor! I'm going to have to review, adjust, shorten and present it in a much better way when the whole experience is finished.


Week 8: Monday 27th June - Sunday 03rd July

Where I was eating one meal at work and something in the evenings, I'm generally only eating one fattier/bigger meal at lunch time. On one occasion through the week I pigged out but chose to enjoy myself with my family after treating my Grandparents to dinner. I could of opted for something healthy but I believe, if you go out, you should enjoy yourself and forget moderation if it is a rare occasion. Anyway, today I had pizza, fried potato squares and a cake for my one meal. I ate this at 12.30 ish which is slightly early for me. Oh and I've just remembered, I completely ruined my fat reduction attempt by drinking about 10 pints at a festival, followed by pizza and something else but I was too drunk to remember! Either way this is a crazy amount of calories and of course I'm trying to avoid alcohol for mental and physical reasons. The reason was I went to Wireless Festival 2011 and again, this is a rare thing and I enjoyed myself. I should of made up for it with eating less or exercising more the next day or two but my appetite was greater, maybe because my stomach was expanded, my body liked the major change in calorific intake... who knows, but it did mess up my appetite. I think I'm getting it back under control now though. Tonight I really felt like cycling, just something in me really wanted to, so I hoped on my bike after working a Sunday at work, which is a shorter day so there is more sunshine hence more time to ride. I don't have a front light for my bike and it's rather dangerous riding in London at the best of times. So tonight I rode 18.6 miles, which is good. The other week, I done 30 but this time I had a greater pace and feel ok after to be honest. I'm really hungry though, I did have a piece of dry bread but it's bed time and as my body burns calories through the night, the plan is to let it burn it from fat rather than eating anything before bed. I have a couple of days off coming up on the Tuesday and Wednesday, so I'll probably cycle long distance then. 50 miles would be great! I know you should build up gradually, but I get a real buzz from doing long distance, so why not. It all helps and according to the figures, the three hours I spent cycling the 30 miles (traffic, stops etc affecting pace accuracy) means I bent over 2,000 calories on that day and tonight about 1,500 which hopefully counteracted the fatty food I ate today. I'm building up a much greater sense of guilt. I am craving certain things I shouldn't that get me down but on the whole, avoiding this is good, let's hope I can keep it that way on my days off. I'm loving the stability in my life which I really needed what with the University lifestyle, realising I can get a certain DRO to reduce the stress of my finances and I hope I read back about the stability so that when I start my second year at University I make a conscious effort to plan my time to include a job and make efforts to join the Sports Teams and seek out other mature students. 


Sunday 03rd July - 17th July


It has become apparent to me that if I can't even be bothered to read the lengthy blog above then who else will! Therefore my efforts to maintain this blog are in vain unless I summarise it a represent it again. My efforts went completely down the pan with the failure to maintain a proper fat montior/weighing scale system. This latest blog entry is 1 week late at it is. I resigned from my job and straight away put on most of the weight I lost from lounging out, catching up with friends having many piss ups and eating shit. I can't be arsed with this anymore. It's true about the weight rebound thing. I'm not even depressed or anything, I just really don't care and am quitting this blog. I've had it. If I'm gonna lose weight, it ain't going to be acting a clever dick with measuring everything only to gain a major weight rebound. It will be through a complete lifestyle change. I don't know, guess I'll just cycle more now I'm back from Essex after my 2 week binge and eat good food over shit. I feel fake as well. Read the 'NOTE' below about academic importance and compare it to my attitude here. 2 different people. My Mother said I'd been brainwashed when we had a discussion about exercise programmes for disabled people. I came up with every answer under the sun to do with the benefits of exercise, inclusion etc but I just remind myself of that guy who uses cliches and talks bull shit to answer everything. You got to be true to yourself and whilst I thought I was being, perhaps I am trying to be more than I am.




Note;

As an academic, I believe it to be important to use the knowledge gained to give something back. It is our duty to share, develop and apply knowledge to better society. As an individual I believe in philanthropy and empathy. I feel a sense of responsibility to help tackle the obesity epidemic. I also empathise with others who have been in the situation I have and wish to use my experience to help.